Holidays are not always celebrations....

 The 4th of July holiday and all of the celebrations surrounding will never feel the same for me ever again. 2 years ago during the week of the 4th we were at the hospital with my sweet daddy and On this date I was sitting by my daddy's bedside holding his hand and saying my goodbye. In the early morning hours of July 6th, God called daddy home and my life has been changed forever. It's been a hard week so far, but today my sweet friend came by and out of the blue brought me flowers mumbling something about a late bday. I had been so sad this morning, but hadn't said anything to anybody. When she left, I looked at the flowers and just started crying like a big baby. I think it was exactly what I needed. I had been holding back the tears and was miserable. The beautiful flowers reminded me to find joy in the unexpected and to remember all the good times I was able to share with my dad. I'm going to try to be happy for the sweet memories I do have instead of sad and put my focus into creating those same sweet memories with my children. I can't promise I won't ever be sad, but I promise to try and focus on good things in my life instead of dwelling in the past.